You’ve probably moved in the last 5-10 years. Moving is a military logistics operation mixed with sentimental rushes and a whole lot of nostalgia. A true test of the brain and the heart all in one. And then a lot of “Wow … I didn’t know we still had this!” de-cluttering decisions. My wife heard a TED talk recently about belongings “Sparking Joy” – and if it sparks no joy: cast it away. Life should be more than the never ending accumulation of stuff, and we’re all nodding our heads right now, that we know how healthy it is to trim down and ask: “do we really need this?” Just very hard to do. But many things, including my Homer Simpson slippers from 2002, were cast out into darkness in the last few weeks. RIP Homer, hello Groot Boots.
First and foremost, it was an incredible blessing to have so many friends and family members come out to help us move. Or lend us trucks and trailers or help for 30 minutes where they could. Big props to Dan Komline for lending his big truck, for Dominic and my Dad in their truck going to Mechanicsville, to DK and Erik P for running another truck to Short Pump for many items, and Jake L., Jennelle and Tyler for showing up after half time as welcome reinforcements. For TJ, Keith, Micah, Rick and Brennan for doing most of the heavy lifting. And of course for everyone in the picture who took care of all of our individual items. Nothing broke!
When people on social media use “#blessed,” often they’re talking about a great meal and a nice evening at the beach, or a new job / car / house / worldly stuff. I think we all love those moments when they come, and to many in America, searching for those moments could be the main point of life, to relish the feelings of temporary peace given by accomplishment. But what then? On to the next accomplishment? I think many believers know that “blessings” are actually spiritual and have to do with what’s in your soul; blessings are much bigger than possessions and achievements alone, so we should all be looking beyond the stuff into the bigger picture.
But I feel #blessed by our robust community and how valuable your efforts were to us last Saturday. Not to mention one of the fastest moving records I can remember. We began at 8am after two weeks of interior packing, and almost by 10:45am, the Uhaul was at the new place and empty! Even with overflow where ya’ll had to load your private vehicles, we were still about 85% moved in before 11am. Record! The real blessing, to me, is in the people and in the secret of life that some people look for all their lives but never quite achieve: belonging to a real community.
We will have you all over soon if you are reading this!
But moving into our first real home also kicked up other thoughts in me that I’ve never had before – and why I’m resurrecting a blog from almost ten years ago.
- I remember my dad once said one of of the proudest days of his life is when he and Mom moved into their first home near the Pony Pastures. He was finished with Med school, mom had finished her time in medical lab work, and they looked around at the new life starting before them – dad said something to the tune of “I’ve made it.” I think many of us can relate to feeling the big shift: one phase of life is ending and a new phase with more permanence is beginning. And we cast all of the meaning into the home itself.
- Is this “settling down”? Is this permanence? I guess that’s up to me and Christina. Settling down feels weird and it’s not exactly what I had in mind. But we love our new place and want it to be an open door for many!
- The Real Estate Seller’s Market of 2020 – 2021 is a shark tank right now – no two ways about it. We saw about 40 homes (3-5 per week) since January until April – and we were zero for 13 of the offers we placed. Out of the 13, only one even sort of half way considered our proposal with a text message back asking if we could come up 10k. After so many rejections and a ruthless bidding war market, we were honestly about to give up and wait til things changed. We placed the 14th, one last one on a whim, without thinking much about it at all – and then got the text back 11:30pm that night that she had picked us – no negotiation needed of any kind! We were ratified.
Throughout the process of seeing 40 homes, I learned a ton about heat pumps, crawl spaces, roofing, leaks, furniture arrangement, backyard projects, and most importantly, Zillow, and the art of the deal haha. I’d be happy to share what we learned and kudos goes to our great agents, Eric Piedra and Lauren Tucker at Shaheen Ruth Martin and Fonville for helping us not to give up. - Practically since leaving home at 18, I’ve never owned my own place. From college dorms, to boarding school dorms as my first teaching job in the UK, to renting apartments with friends or my wife, to subleasing from friends in Church Hill that work for CHAT, to military barracks – I’m realizing how much money I sent into all of these situations without accruing any equity and ownership whatsoever. NOT that it was a mistake to live my life on the move like that – such great experiences and no rush to settle down at all – but ownership is a new and welcomed change. I can do whatever I want with my walls and my grass. Speaking of grass…
Yard work – what?
Week one in the new house – my first serious purchase was a battery powered mower, blower and hedge trimmers. No more gas and oil. Disruption! Seems like many people already knew about this disruptive revolution to gas power, but I missed the memo. My head is still spinning thinking of all the hours of my childhood gone trying to get a lawn mower engine to start or find spark plugs. Cest la vie. This neighborhood has a pretty strong lawn game from what I can see so far.
Speaking of neighbors…
We now have real neighbors!
The topic of “loving one’s neighbor” is a long long discussion – one I look forward to having again and putting into practice starting today. Sometimes you’re the recipient, sometimes you’re the giver. Many people here have waived (not a lot of waiving in the Fan sad to say), and one neighbor already came by to ask if I need any tools and to give us tips on how Henrico picks up the garbage. Super helpful. I look forward to getting to know many people on our street, inviting them in for meals, and seeing how we can support their lives.
The biggest thanks in this whole thing goes to Melanie for an amazing lunch in our overgrown front yard that made all of the hard work worth it. We love you Mom! Happy Mother’s Day!
Currently listening to a classic. Tell me am I right to think that there could be nothing better ….